Leaving My Heart: Kihae Sihae
by thecoolauthorwithstory
Summary: Kibum is leaving Super Junior-while Donghae have to faced a half of his broken heart. With his family issues,Siwon and Kibum. He wish a miracle could occur by a certain girl-Ji Hyo.  KIHAE SIHAE DONGHAE/SONG JI HYO SIWON/SONG JI HYO
1. Don't Leave Me Kibum!

Donghae watches as his brother (member) Siwon snuggled up with Kyuhyun. He doesn't get why but he felt a pang of jealousy. Just looking at them hugging. His best bud,Kibum who was seating next to him. Announces that he'll be departing from the group for his acting career. Hearing this,made Donghae throat tightened as his best friend announces it.

"The director ask me if i want to participate for it. But i felt that i knew i did the right thing if i left for acting. There just too much pressure,i hope all you hyungs can accept that. I'll miss you guys."

Eunhyuk was the first to cry. "But Kibum-"

"You have to accept the fact that hes more fitting for acting Hyuk," Leeteuk explained. "Just let him do of what he feels what right. That's all it is."

Kanging scoffed "But couldn't he help acted for a movie anytime while still being a member here?"

"Its too much work for him hyung." Heechul argued.

"That causes too much stress for a person!" Leeteuk declared.

Kibum sighed "I'm just asking guys!"

Suddenly,everyone burst into argument.

...

Seeing all the hyungs fighting causes Ryewook and Eunhyuk (who cries the easiest) to have tears in their eyes before they knew it. "But i thought we're brothers, i thought i know you!" Eunhyuk sniffed. "It doesn't mean we should be apart from each other. We still could communicate-"

The members haven't notice it but a droplet tiny tears had fallen from...

Donghae...

The room gone quiet as he sniffed and wipe his tears away. But it suddenly formed into a huge pool of tears. He keep on sniffing as his eyes got watery and red. Seeing their fight and glancing over at Kibum. He couldn't hold it in anymore.

"I thought we're close Kibum... We do everything with each other,AND NOW YOUR'RE JUST GOING TO LEAVE! NOT CARING HOW I FELT?" he yelled.

They all looked at Donghae in surprised as they waited for Kibum to respond.

And as expected...

He cried too...

* * *

><p>BANG!<p>

He stomped out the room,hitting the door with a loud bang. Siwon watched as he shot Kibum a last glance before rushing out the door with tears in his eyes. Everyone saw the hurt look,they immediately regret of what they just argued before.

Siwon,he felt sorry for his brother so he went out too. "Excuse me"

He close the door and ran out after Donghae.

...

"DONGHAE!"

He shouted out his names. But Donghae din't care who's following him. Siwon eventually caught up to him and grab him by the hand.

"Why..-why did you run?"

He gulped and started sniffing again. He din't have to know who it was. He knew it was Siwon who ran after him.

"I-I don't know..."

He heard his brother sighed and rested on the sidewalk. He face Siwon and notice that the prince has not understood why he do this. He sat down beside Siwon,still got tears in his eyes. He swallow the lump in his throat and cries silently again.

"Don't cry"

Siwon reaches his arm out to Donghae shoulders and give him a light hug. It makes Donghae cried even harder.

"Kibum is my only close friend...yet now he left. I don't know what i could do without him. On top of that,my dad.."

The prince nodded. He knew Donghae has a rough childhood. His dad left him and both haven't seen each other in six years. Yet whenever he sees Donghae,the guy always had a grin smile on his face. He always look happy.

"I miss...him. I din't mean to yell at Kibum. But too much..too much is on my life now...I don't know how to dealt with..."

Siwon looked at him with saddest look he ever given to someone. He hugged Donghae with sincere as Donghae cries on his shoulders. They stayed in this position until Donghae could stopped. Siwon din't mind,he know hes always has to be there with the member he loves most.

"Don't worry Donghae..i'm still here for you"

* * *

><p>Kibum wipe a tears away as he packed his stuffs in the dorm. After being yelled at by Donghae,he felt as if he had just hurt someone...no other than his best friend. It hurt him,that he have to leave Super Junior,leaving all of his dearest brothers behind. Especially Donghae...he knew he did the right thing,but it hurt him. A lot.<p>

Hangeng,who shared the dorm with him. Had saw him crying so he reached for a tissue and gave it to him. Kibum silently wipe his tears away and sniffed. He hated crying,worse...whenever he cried. Donghae would comfort him and give him a hug,not anymore...

"Your're okay?" his hyung asked. "Donghae seems pretty tough on you."

Kibum sighed "I don't know...i hope i chose the right thing hyung."

Hangeng nodded at him,his hand on Kibum shoulders. "Of course you do."

* * *

><p><em>At the airport <em>

The members watched with a pain in their chest as they saw Kibum pulling his suitcase up to the plane. By then,he were to be transported to Japan as for his new next movie. This causes their albums to be delay for next year.

Everyone gather around,giving him hugs and farewell but most importantly...lucks.

"Good luck for the movie" Siwon said.

The younger boy nodded, "Thanks"

He glance around all the members and notice only Donghae wasn't here. Yet this is the last time,there no other than much pain he felt like now. Like his heart had been broke in half,the most important friend in his life is not here and this would be the last time they saw each other.

Sighing,he pulled his suitcase further away from them and was about to attend the flight when a voice had called his name out from the long distance.

"KIBUM!"

Puzzled,everyone turned to find Donghae rushing through the crowds filled with fans. He eventually caught up to him and give him one of the biggest hug he ever gave to anyone. Surprised,Kibum widened his eyes and nearly cry.

"Sorry for yelling...but i'll miss you"

That's when the tears ran down and he felt the urge of bringing Donghae closer for the hug. Donghae din't stopped him either,and he had a tear strolled down his cheeks too. The scene just made all the members cry and touched by the affection between the best friends. Even Siwon smiled at them.

"I'll promise i'll write you letters and email-even though i knew you'll be busy." he told him.

Kibum smiled "I'll replied to every one of the letters even if i'm busy."

Standing there,paparazzi were flashing pictures at the scene with brightness in their eyes. They knew they're going to get lots of money if they published this articles. But neither of the members cared.

Donghae give Kibum a quick but sincere goodbye hug before Kibum finally have to go. By now,all the Super Junior members are crying tears.

Because of losing of one of the most special member in the band...

* * *

><p><em>In the morning <em>

Donghae woke up in a dorm with no Kibum on his own bed,sleeping next to him. Sighing,he sat up and went towards the bathroom to do his routine, then picked a suit with black ties and black shoes.

Around noon,all the members had woken up and had all agreed to go to Dine Dash for breakfast. They got in their limousine and set off.

* * *

><p>Ji Hyo,who had been taking orders for the two wealthy couples,had seen the Super Junior members outside the diner window and immediately,millions of paparazzi and fans surrounded them. Then the bodyguard came and shoo them away.<p>

She rush to the glass window and held the door for every one of them to come in. Greeting them with a bright smile.

"Hey guys"

They response back to her with a 'hey' before she led them to one of the reservation room that the manager had ordered earlier. All sat down with a menu as she came to each of them for their beverage. Then its Donghae turn...

"Can i order your drink?"

He din't replied back,instead. He just kept his head low to the menu,barely recognizes she was here.

She coughed "Uh-what would you like?"

Silence...

Giving up,Leeteuk decided to speak up for his member. "Sorry Mong-Ji,Kibum just left last night so our Donghae were depressed about it. But i guess a few ice tea would calm him down,you can get him jasmine tea." She widened her eyes in surprised "O-Oh i'm sorry! Um...so i'll just go get all of your orders". She hurriedly scurries towards the kitchen and tell the chefs of what they were suppose to cook. She sighed and wonder what had made Donghae so upset...

* * *

><p>Donghae nearly felt his tears fallen again,after only a few hours-but yet he missed his friend already,he and Kibum would usually sit at another table and hang out on their own since he knows Kibum is plain quiet. But now...he felt lonely,what could he do to stopped this abandoning feeling? How could he forget about it and move on? His bond with Kibum were even extra special more than the other members.<p>

Can't hold it in anymore. He silently got up and left the restaurant with no reluctant.

* * *

><p>He was in the limo,resting when he saw Siwon came by and flung the door opened so that they could sit with each other. It was only them since the driver has already attended to another business. Donghae blinked at his hyung.<p>

"I thought your're there with them." he said quietly.

The gentleman chuckled, "How could i be in there when your're all alone here with no Kibum?"he said. "This has been the second time you ran off again."

"-And the second time for you to ran out after me" Donghae teased.

Siwon smirked "Why you don't want me here?"

Donghae felt himself flushed,"O-Of course i do."

The prince chuckled again and face his brother. "It looks like how you treated Ji Hyo there were making her hurt by your action."

Donghae frowned "What did i do?"

"You din't replied to her when she asks you for your beverage-remember?"Siwon reminded him.

"Oh..." his voice faltered.

The prince sighed "I understand that you miss him...but Ji Hyo looks like's she really like you." he said.

"I know...but..."

Siwon frowned at his younger brother "-but what?"

"I'm in love with someone else..."

The prince puzzled,with someone else? "You mean Jessica?"

"No not her..."

He scratched his head "Uh..."

Donghae sighed "Do i need to tell you?"

"It's okay if you don't want to"

He slumped back. "Okay..."

_At least i din't have to tell him it's him..._


	2. Awkward & An Unsure Jealousy?

It's been 3 months since i last saw Kibum-and those 3 months were those difficult months. Siwon and I would usually hang out a lot-but even if i love Siwon. A part of me wants Kibum here,the three of us would usually talks and guest starred on lots of variety shows together like 'Super Summer'.

I was at the Dine Dash with Siwon. Discussing about our newest movie roles-Skip Beat. When Ji Hyo then came by,when she saw me,she kept her head low. I knew the incident still put us in awkward mode,especially when i found out she had a crush on me. For a moment,i felt like an idiot...

"Your orders" she questioned,still getting her nose stuck in her notepad. Siwon look from her to me,then he smirked.

"You can get both of us Kimchi and some Yongdam tea-you should get one for yourself too."

She smiled,knowing what he meant. "Alright,my break is here soon anyway."

She did a quick bow at us before disappearing to the kitchen. Siwon took a sip of his coke and gave me a stern look. "Don't mess up again."

I blinked,what did he meant? "What did i do?"

"It's been 3 months sine you last saw her since what happens remember?" Siwon pointed out, "Aish-that was a bit rude."

Oh i know it is.

"Just cause i ignored her doesn't means that i will promptly ignore her forever. She knows that,and i know she probably heard about Kibum departing"

It was sad,but i have to bear myself to say his name,the one word i haven't said for a long time.

Siwon cocked his head and smirked "As you wish"

* * *

><p>The order came,and Siwon,as the gentlemen he is,prepare the chair for her and let her sit down. I heard her thank him and he smiled at her,huh,they actually look like two couple on a date.<p>

I just shrugged at them and began eating the Kimchi. It was too much spices,i had to tell them to pour me a lot of glass of water,though Siwon looks perfectly fine as he ate his meal in an intelligent manner. While I,on the other hand,look like a kid who had been getting stuffed with over 50 Jolokia peppers.

"You want me to get you something else?" she asked me,worried,why should she? I'm the one who had been consciously ignoring her,who doesn't replied her question 'rudely',and the one who put us in an awkward mode,and up until now...she still...care?

"No i'm fine-thanks" i answered,grinning widely. She just pour me more water in return,i could tell,she knows i don't like her food. Aish! Why am i the one who mess this up? I wish i could get Siwon table manner-though he did buy me a book on that for last Christmas.

"-Why don't we drink some Yongdam tea?" Siwon suggested to both of us. We nodded our head. We din't have more cups on the table though- "I'll get us some cups first-be right back." she notified,and quickly scampered away to the kitchen.

I kept my head low as i sat there,waiting for the tea,until i felt Siwon tapping on my shoulder,i perked up in surprise and look up at him. His face was usual-ish,but i could see some sort of 'you fail again' in his eyes.

"Try again"

I groaned and lay on the table, what is with him anyway? I'm detaching myself from Ji Hyo every time i see her now.

* * *

><p>So now we're drinking tea,at least it was better than the Kimchi,but the atmosphere were more...tense.<p>

But i thank Siwon for starting all sorts of conversations.

"You know-i drank this a lot with Donghae while filming 'Exploration Human Body' we thought it tasted bitter,but now we're fully grown to this bitter-tasting drink. Good thing you add more sugars"

She laughed "That's very good to know-i think i saw that episode."

Siwon smiled,i could saw his dimples,he like her? They look very natural talking to each other-instead me-who talked to this girl like a child at a spelling bee contest. I felt left out,and a queasy feeling were in my stomach-jealousy? No-Siwon a guy and I'M a guy,even if i have mutual feelings for him,doesn't truly means that he can't fall in love with a girl. HE can,and so can I...

But i din't...

"So hows the Running Man going?" Siwon asked naturally.

Oh right,yea Ji Hyo is not only a waitress in Dine Dash. But she's also a member of the Running Man cast,this shows where they tried all sorts of missions. I actually felt like a kid when i heard that i can be on a mission team-being a spy. Siwon had been in Running Man,he was guest starred along with Kim Min Jong and had been put on the chasing team,it was during winter.

I remember when me,Kibum and Siwon were watching it in his room during Christmas Eves. They put captions on Siwon like 'Running Man Prince Mania Siwon' or 'He understand Running Man the most'. I laughed like a maniac when i saw it,hysterical Siwon were shown while they were filming at a toy department store. It was funny!

Ji Hyo was on the mission team and i admit-shes a pro in these situation. So if i ever get to starred in Running Man,i want her on my mission team. It would be like a movie. I saw Siwon chasing her around,heh,and the commander.

She shrugged "We still filmed daily-but Gary had been begging too much."

Kang Gary,who is 'rumored' to be her boyfriend on Running Man. Kang Gary,who get jealous whenever Siwon went on Running Man with Song Ji Hyo. Kang Gary-who had been a Monday boyfriend to her. Kang Gary,who kept begging her.

"Maybe i want to starred in there again" Siwon teased.

Is it just me-or is it that Siwon were getting friendlier with her? This lover act had gotta stop! Wait...what am i saying?

"I want you to oppa!" she whined.

They do know i'm still here right?

I fake coughed,the two saw me and perked up in surprise. What? They thought i just popped out of nowhere?

"So where Kibum shii?"

I nearly choked when i heard her,my tea nearly evaporate! Well it did but it just spilled now! Hearing that name just...i don't know. But my depression state reconnected all over again,why is it so hard for me? All the other members are doing fine,except me...

"Oh right-our dongsaeng..."

Siwon couldn't speak. He knew if he tell the story all over again,i would be hurt,then Ji Hyo and I would be MORE awkward.

She shrugged "It's okay if guys don't want to say it"

THANK GOD!

She look at me "-It just that-tell him i congratulates him on passing his role in his new movie"

"Okay..." i replied back meekly.

I know Siwon would look at me as if i'm crazy,it's official. Lee Donghae and Song Ji Hyo are the most awkward couple in the world.

* * *

><p>Ever since that happened,i consciously ignoring her. MORE than before,well i wouldn't want to ignore my friend,but i couldn't if we ever walk to Dine Dash. That's when we talks,other than that. This relationship is awkward, it seems she's ignoring me too.<p>

But it all changed again when i was jogging int he morning.

I was jogging around the park,suddenly din't realized-and by then-I bumped into someone! But this isn't just some accident where one person would goes "Oh i'm sorry!" and then the other person would goes "It's alright" and then they keep on jogging ahead. This one was awkward,and unusual.

I was on the ground,my back aches, as i groggily opened my eyes only to found that only person. Song Ji Hyo. With her hair framing perfectly arranged on her face,how the strands of her hair were swept to the sides like a bang,and how I,had my hand touching those hairs which was soft and angelic.

Her hand were clasping my white shirt,i din't seem to focus and nor does she. We stayed like this without a care int he world,at least...i din't. Her eyes were pretty,it was brown,i had a like for brown eyes. I had dark ones but i figured lighter one are more pretty and attractive to look at.

But it seems as if lightning zapped and she suddenly realized reality were here-so she got off of me and dusted herself. I got up too-but only to met by an annoying reality talks. Reality pissed me off sometimes.

"OH GOSH-I'M SO SORRY HAE! I DIN'T MEAN TO DO THIS TO YOU! I DON'T KNOW IF I BUMPED INTO YOU OR YOU TO ME-BUT EITHER WAY-I'M SORRY SORRY! SORRY! PLEASE-I WAS JUST JOGGING AND I DIN'T KNOW THAT YOU WERE-"

I stared at her...

"-here"

I sighed in annoyance,at all the things she have to say. "Don't worry,it's not your fault,i'm the one who did it so stop blaming yourself like an idiot."

"Okay..." she replied.

I walk up ahead,not glancing back,not saying a word,i practically are more embarrassed than she was. I din't look back at her.

* * *

><p>I was on the laptop the next day, (after the incident) checking emails, when i suddenly saw that i have a new mail.<p>

From Kibum...

I was so excited, i could barely hold my excitement in as i open the mail and started to read what he wrote me.

**TO: donghaeeastseayahoo. com**

**FROM: seoulkimkibumyahoo. com**

**Hey fishy,**

**I just got time to go on the computer to send you e-mail. So far,my acting experience has been progressing very well,i met a lot of celebrities in the US while on my tour here. There lots of new stuffs to try, what about you? How are you and hyungs? Are you guys doing well? Did you film No Other yet?**

**I miss you fishy, i wish you could be here.**

**And i heard the trouble between you and Ji Hyo noona-don't worry Hae. If you need a matchmaker-i'll still be here.**

**Love**

**Bummie **

I smiled,and started to type the reply.

* * *

><p>Me and Leeteuk hyung were playing cards in the living room, when we suddenly heard yelling and shouting coming from our dorm.<p>

"SIWON! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!"

"Kyuhyun calm down! Seriously! I never treat you that different!"

"BUT YOU NEVER PAY ATTENTION TO ME ANYMORE!"

"That's because too much things on my mind now-i don't have time to have little arguments like this! "

"NO!"

Then we saw Kyuhyun stomping out the room and out the door with Siwon following after him. What happen? Why did Kyuhyun got upset? Why did they fight?

"Ah- Kyuhyun shii and Siwon shii would break up soon"

Hearing that,i froze up. Break...up?

"Leeteuk hyung-i don't get it. Why?" I asked, still confused. "Are they having an affair?" i whispered, that might be the only reason.

Leeteuk frowned at me "You don't know that?"

I closed my mouth in shock,how could i be so oblivious to this?

* * *

><p>It was late evening before dinner when i was playing with my action figures that Kibum had sent to me from the US, (they have tons of them-but mostly spider man) when someone went in my room without knocking.<p>

I blinked and look up from what i'm doing. I saw Kyuhyun, standing there with his arms crossed.

"Aish- Donghae hyung, can i talk to you?"

I nodded my head. "Sure"

We followed out and went in his bedroom. Kyuhyun room were simple, flat screen TV and bed and drawers-you know, all that stuffs. But i noticed he has lots of posters of Siwon, odd...where did he get that?

The younger maknae sat on his bed and inquired me to sit on the floor, i stuck my tongue out at him. Rude! You let your hyung sit on the floor? Well he is an evil maknae, but still-Aish! This kid.

"Donghae shii-let's be together"

I choke on my saliva, with my blank face.

It's seems though, i get the wrong idea. Because next, he started to explain to me to get rid of my dumbfounded face. He told me, by being together, he would make Siwon jealous. To me, it is unreasonable and not fine. I don't want to fool Siwon with such things, but i could tell he needed Siwon attention a lot, so as being a hyung, i accepted it.

"All i want is to see Siwon jealous..."

His voice echoing in my mind...not getting lost.

The worst thing is that all the hyungs are gonna find out that i'm gay. And that, me and my youngest dongsaeng are together. Hmm...what will Siwon thinks?


	3. PEM Sohee: Donghae Twin

"Kibum oppa!"

I turn around to found that girl, the one that made my heart skip a beat. Ahn Sohee.

She probably one of the only girl i can contact with since Wonder Girls are in the US, we talk and hang out ever since i learned that they were in the US. I supported her, i think that she has some good confidence in herself since peoples considered her quiet like me. I understand her, and she understand me. I saw her acting in a movie a few time like with her co-star, Kim Bum, which his name is exactly like mine so why not let it be me instead? The one who could be with her.

"Ah- Sohee shii" I smiled, i like it when i said her name. It sounds cute for someone like her. Donghae hyung would stalked me if he ever found out i'm with a girl.

"Kibum shii! Unnies just asks me if you want to come to our concert, can you go right now?" she said, grinning widely. "This concert is one of a lifetime for me, can you be there oppa?"

Something telling me that i should.

"Sure Sohee, i'll be there" i answered, i hope she notice that i'm not trying to impress her- i truly have nothing to do now anyway.

She giggled and clap her hands happily "Thank you so much oppa!"

Then out of the blue, she hugged me, TIGHTLY. I was beet red in the face and i clearly don't know what to do-except hugging her back, which she din't decline, cause she squished me even harder.

We let go after a minute and looked at each other. There were a glimpse, telling me that this girl might be the one. The one who would cure that dying broken heart of mine after ever feeling that leaving Donghae was the worst decision i ever made. But if Donghae expect me to be happy and move on, i would do so.

Cause i used to be in love with him...

"Your're welcome"

* * *

><p>The ride was long, but we finally made it to the destination. I admit, the US are a lot larger than back home in Seoul, and their education were a lot more opportunities for children. I met up with all the Wonder Girls members, they greeted me and said i could join backstage later on, i decided to agreed and watch the concert in there.<p>

Seeing this concert...made me wished that Super Junior could have one too, someday. I wanted my band for the best, we all worked hard and i prayed for a concert one day. I knew this means everything to them, and i'm glad that Wonder Girls have achieve what they want.

Donghae told me, it means the world to him one day, walking up on stage and continuing endless performances...

I was sitting there backstage, looking around. Sohee saw me, she was preparing herself so she silently walked over to where i was and sat down next to me. I looked up and saw her looking at me, i smiled.

"Are you nervous?"

She shrugged "K-Kinda"

She stuttered, it means she's nervous more than ever.

I decided to maker her more confident. "You shouldn't be, what you are about to experience is what I always dream of."

And it's true, i always wanted this.

"You...dream of this?"

"Ah"

She looked sad for a moment. "Should i go up there?"

"You should" i replied. "Don't just give up, if you made it this far, don't disappoint your unnies."

I heard her sighed "Why should they? I barely even do good, unlike you who are probably one of the best dancer and belong to one of the best band in our country. What more could anyone want?"

I was shocked from hearing that, the situation were reversed. Now SHE teaching me.

"It's not as if i'm disappointed in my band, it just that...i'm a disgrace to them."

Her eyes started to watering, "I'm way quiet, sometimes they barely even notice i'm here, i dance in average- my voice is not that good either. I'm not talented like you, Kibum...I-"

I din't want to listen to her words, i know none are true. I did the unexpected thing i ever did to a girl.

I hug her.

It's not normal for me to do a thing like that. She's always the one who would forced me to hug her, not me to her.

"Stop blaming yourself! Your beautiful and talented- i don't deserved to hear what you said about me- i never been that happy like you either. I felt left out too, but i always tried my best to suck it up and see whats my band has done for me-because of them...i get to be here with you-they told me, what's my true talent is, i listen to them. And look where i am"

My eyes begin to get watery " I never regret of being with you-your the one who help me understand what i needed to do to find my true talent. I miss being with my brothers, but they wanted me to do something that's fit me. And..."

I hesitated "I would be disappointed too if i don't see you on the stage..."

She looked at me with tears, she was speechless. I was too, but i kept silent and waited for her to reply.

"I'm sorry...-"

She hugged me tighter "I-I-"

"I know" i cut in quickly and released her "Please go..."

She nodded and gave me a reassuring smiles, the one i knew...

Only for me...

"I will...thanks Kibum!"

She turned to go, but i hold back her wrist and i gave her a peck on the cheek. Her blush deepen and she din't look at me.

I smirked "Now you can go"

* * *

><p>It was late at night after the concert, it was even better than what i expected. And as planned, Sohee promised me and did better than i expect her to. We live in the same dorm-BEFORE you get any wrong ideas- we have separate rooms.<p>

I figured it would be better that way anyway, i like seeing her sleepy face when she woke up.

She's in her room now, so i decided to go on my laptop and check my mails.

I type in (yahoo!) and signed in my account. In total, i have 33 new mails-but the first one caught my attention.

Donghae hyung reply!

I was excited as i opened it up and anticipated to see what my hyung wrote to me. This might be the best thing that has happens today-except where i gave Sohee a kiss- but still!

**TO: seoulkimkibumyahoo. com**

**FROM: donghaeeastseayahoo. com**

**Hi Bummie!**

**BUMMIE! I FREAKIN MISS YOU! YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I WAITED FOR YOUR MAIL? MORE THAN 4 WEEKS! Hearing that you love your acting made me very happy- your enjoying at what has not been given to before. But i hope you know that i still want you back no matter what!-Promise me you'll come home for vacation?**

**About the Ji Hyo situation. First of all- we're very good friend and i like her. SHE the only girl i can talk to, but i mess it up a lot, let alone...we are very awkward Bummie...maybe you can help me?**

**Leeteuk hyung keep saying that i'm being lovesick about you- what do you think? Am i?**

**I hope one day i can see you again- we're all gonna welcome you with big hug and kis- **

I din't get to finished reading when i saw Sohee squealing behind me. I nearly jumped from my chair when i heard that squeal-WHERE DID SHE COME FROM? I hopped back to the computer and glanced behind me...

"Oh gosh! Kibum shii! Your boyfriend are so sweet!" she squeaked.

My eyes bulged out-larger than a freaking melon!-DID SHE JUST SAID THAT I'M GAY? I'M NOT FREAKING GAY! WHY DO AMERICANS THOUGHT I'M GAY WITH DONGHAE WHENEVER I DESCRIBES HIM? WELL I USED TO LOVE HIM-BUT STILL! I'M NO LONGER GAY!

Great...even my own love thought i'm gay with my brother...

"Sohee! Why did you read my mails!" i whined, stomping my feet. "It supposed to be private!"

She looked sad again "i'm sorry oppa..."

I grunt, so this is the part where I have to be the one who would apologizes. Din't I suffered enough?

"Don't cry"

She immediately stopped. "Then can I?"

I frowned "What?"

She kept quiet and walked over to the computer and continued to...

READ MY EMBARRASSING PRIVATE MAIL!

"AISH! SOHEEEEEEEEE!"

* * *

><p>The next day, me and Sohee were going shopping.<p>

You thought i meant the mall din't you? No we're shopping groceries. Something you eat but not wear.

Right now, it's almost Patrick Day, so when i passed by many aisles. I saw lots of green leprechaun and ELF. Huh, looks like our fans are getting big this year. Sohee were looking at the food so she din't noticed me going to that aisle and slipped in a Patrick Day Teddy Bear.

"Oppa, what do you want to buy?" she asked me.

I look at the various goods and supplies that were filled on the shelf, i decided sushi and ingredients for Kimchi. She nodded and ask me if i wanted salmon. "Salmons over here are frozen, i don't know if its the same as in Seoul." i tried to explain, but she wouldn't take no for an answer.

"Oppa! I want salmon!" she pouted childishly. I chuckled at her, but then suddenly seen visions of Donghae in front of me...

_It's weird how they both like salmons..._

Again, it saddened me. But i din't want Sohee to sees me like this so i decided to buy it instead. "Sure i'll pay"

"No i'm going to pay" she declined.

I slipped the moneys to the cashier and handed her the goods. Sohee glared at me but dropped the subject. "Fine oppa, you win this time!"

I laughed at her childishness.

* * *

><p>It was Friday, meaning 'Drama Night' as Sohee calls it. This is when we go to my room and have a 'Friday Drama'. No worries, I slept on the floor in my sleeping bag. I let her sleep in my bed is because she loves my bed more than anything, if i ask her. What do you want for Christmas?<p>

"Your bed oppa! Your bed!"

I sweat drop at the memory. Don't ask me how i met her.

I changed into my Pj's and immediately saw the door flung open. Good thing i'm quick enough to put on my pants or else we'll have major issues here! She saws me shirtless! I was frozen in my spot, and so is she.

Her cheeks were flush and her head went any direction to not see my gaze. "You can put on some shirt oppa" she muttered.

I zapped back, "Sorry"

I put on my gray shirt and motioned for her to come in. Her expression then change to a cheerful expression when she saw me shuffling through the DVDs. She sat on the couch and turn on the flat screen TV.

"Oppa, can we watched Titanic?"

I laughed, we watched this movie almost every time she came over. She was that type of girl who dream of true love or first sight of love or-whatever those fairy tales is. I, on the other hand, watches action movies. Mostly Jackie Chan.

"Sohee shii-we watched this just last week already" I informed her.

She crossed her arms "But why not? You watched Iron Pants too!"

"Iron Man" i corrected her.

She rolled her eyes "Fine then."

Then she begin to have watery eyes, okay. So basically, her talent is to cry, because whenever she cried, I have to comfort her.

"Alright alright! We'll watched Titanic then" I said, looking for a DVDs that has the cover of a gigantic ship with the iceberg along with the scene where that girl went "Jack jack!" on the board while the guy is in the ocean.

Don't tell Sohee this, but i get teary eyes when i watch that too-what? A guy express emotions too. Donghae cried even harder than me.

"THANK YOU OPPA! THANK YOU!"

It's like this girl a weather, first she rain- then she sunny and then she's windy. "YAY YAY YAY!" I heard her shouted.

But then again, she never fail to bring a smile upon my face. She reminded me so much of Donghae, that for a moment. I misses him, his cheerful smiles and the way he acted like a bunny around Siwon. I wonder how they're doing now, especially Donghae hyung...

After loading the DVDs, I went on the couch and sat next to Sohee. She was so focused on the movie, she din't even notice the popcorn i made that was in her lap. I kept looking at her but not the movie while i ate the popcorn.

The romance was sweet, but Sohee is sweeter.

* * *

><p>We watched the movie for 2 hours before it was 12:00 and went prepare to go to bed. At least i was, but Sohee wasn't.<p>

"What's wrong?" I asked.

She firmly hold her blanket and looked at me. "Oppa, can we talk?"

"Sure" I agreed.

I thought it was going to be serious. Since she never done this before to me, so i payed close attention but all she said was-

"What is so special about Donghae hyung?"

I nearly burst out laughing, at all the thing she could ask. She just have to picked Donghae, but when I noticed she was serious. I grew solemn as well, "Why you'd ask?" I questioned.

"Because i always saw you interviewing him to the public, and how both of you always email each other."

She made it sounds as if we're dating...

"-And the name sounds really special"

Donghae. Huh...

"Well he is my brother Sohee. I respected him" I said, and it's true. I respected as much as Leeteuk hyung.

She smiled "It's sounds like you have feelings for him" she spoke softly.

Feelings? Sohee, why are you asking me this? Unless...

"Sohee you like me?"

I swear, when I said that. She blinks more than 100 times, "Liking you? Of course I do! Kibum oppa!"

"R-Really?" I said, reddish my face.

"Of course I do! Who told you i hate you? Your the best oppa i ever had! We're best friend you know?"

And there it goes again, the regret and sorrowful disappointment...

"Why'd you ask?"

I shook my head "Never mind..."

It seems we're off subject now, she have heck no ideas what i'm saying. Maybe type of people like her are dense...

"Oppa i'm tired now" she yawned cutely.

I chuckled, "Alright let's go to bed"

But she din't let me get off the bed, she hold my hand and motioned for me to...sleep here...

"Wha-"

"Can you sleep here with me?"

I blink, haven't she had any ideas what i will do if i slept here? I slept once with Donghae but ONLY because I have nightmares that time. I rather object, cause unless she haves nightmares then I-

"I have nightmares sometimes."

I groan, but my stupid conscience have to stay awake up until now.

**Aha! I know you wanted to- **

**SHUT UP! I yelled **

"Sure" I smiled sweetly.

But she din't hear me since she was already asleep. I chuckled before turning off the lamp and looked at her sleepy face in the dark. I'm going to lay here a bit, and gonna go back to my stupid sleeping bag soon.


	4. Lucks For Me! Oh Mr Siwon!

_It's a nice weather today _I thought as i saw the sunshine and the blue skies. I usually daydream whenever I work, since where I work is surrounded by a beautiful background. Dine Dash is a great place to work, not only the tips receives from high class customer-but the scene too. The place were near a forest,which has waterfall.

I know it's sounds strange but Siwon,Donghae and I usually take a picnic there when we were kids. My parents used to work here so they usually let us go there on Friday, it was really fun. But past is past, now we're in the present.

Now I really notice that Donghae is ignoring me for real, and now I found out that Kibum had left Super Junior through the SBS news.

Oops...

Now I guess why he's ignoring me. I guess I been such an idiot. Like he said.

**RRRRRRR**

Oh here comes the customer.

I put on my cap and went to open the door, but only to found myself smiling again.

Siwon was standing there like a model when he's wearing a blue checkered square shirt and ripped blue jeans. This gentlemen...always has to look good doesn't he? I stepped aside and let him come in.

"You din't need to hold the door for me" he told me as soon as I let him sat at a table near the waterfall scene.

"I'm still a waitress, not a damsel in distress" I joked as I prepared all the tableware. "Orders-"

I got cut off when I saw a man comes in.

It was Gary...

* * *

><p>"Why is he's here?" Gary spat out as soon as he saws Siwon there.<p>

I was furious at how he treated Siwon, "Oppa, you don't need to be rude! He's my customer!"

Gary was looking at Siwon as if Siwon is a dangerous insect that must be dissect, I was worried for both of them. Siwon gave the older man a hard stare too, I was in the middle, feeling helpless.

More customers came in and I recognized the familiar voice.

"Gary shii! Stop bothering people! I told you Mong Ji is already busy! We're late for the filming!"

I let out a sigh of relief. It's Jong Kook oppa.

"It's seems like she is" I overheard Gary "Join us next time then"

Gary stomped out the restaurant, Jong Kook look at me then Siwon then to the door where Gary stomped out and he smirked.

"Alright Mong Ji, join us next time ne?"

I nodded at him. "Sure Oppa, i'll be there for 75."

He nodded too and greeted Siwon "Bye Siwon"

Siwon bowed his head in return before Jong Kook made his way. I sighed and resume my current point, "I'm sorry,what's your orders?"

"Beef noodle and green tea- Ji Hyo shii?"

I turn my head to look at him "Yeah?"

"Am i bothering you and Gary...?"

I couldn't believe it...he's blaming himself even if Gary is treating him unfairly! Din't he sees that he din't even bother to mess with Gary? I know Siwon is a thousand times stronger than Gary but he never intended to get violence!

I guess that's what I like about him...

I gave him an reassuring smile "Don't worry-"

* * *

><p>"Ji Hyo unnie! Why din't you yell at him?" Lizzy pouted at me.<p>

Lizzy and Hye Kyo were at my house, the three of us were getting ready for the new release of Running Man. Well me and Lizzy were, Hye Kyo unnie have to attend the press conference of Full House so she can't be there to watch. But she wanted to get us ready, so that she could listen to my 'Gary and I' drama-as i would like to call it.

"Lizzy ah- I din't get to before Jong Kook oppa came. I can't believe Siwon oppa din't defend himself or fight back!"

"We all know Gary is violence when it came to you-Ji Hyo shii. Every fans adored you guys as the Monday Couple remember?" Hye Kyo teased, "Admit it, he can be sweet for a boyfriend."

Song Hye Kyo approve of Kang Gary. Sweet? When he talk rude with my customers? Check.

Lizzy declined, "No way, i rather sees commander oppa with you-Ji Hyo unnie!"

Lizzy who rather sees me with Scary Jong Kook Commander. Rather? When he's has been called the most scariest in Running Man? Check.

I sighed "You both know I like Donghae anyway! I agreed with none of you!"

* * *

><p><strong>For today, all of you will be formed a team with 7 stars that has made Korea proud. <strong>

"Girl Generation?" Haha shouted.

**First will be Gary & Haha team **

I barely even paying attention to whats going on, thoughts of Siwon were still filling in my mind, how he-

**It's a hot summer!  **

The music were playing as soon as the door opened to reveal Sulli shii, from (f(x)). Huh...so she will be joining with Gary.

"WOAH! SULLI SHII!"

"YOU LOOK EVEN PRETTIER THAN THE LAST TIME!"

I twitched, I met her before.

She seems happy and so is Gary, so i'm glad. But I just wish to see the two guests that will join me today!

**Next is Jong Kook & Jaesuk team**

The door opened again-

**I want nobody, nobody but you!**

Sohee from Wonder Girls-wait...

She stepped in and greeted everybody-but somehow, it looks like something had happened so she can't be here now. The audience were curious, what happen? They din't know what was happening. But I heard it was something about the US.

**Sorry for the sudden, it looks like Sohee can't participate in the show today with us-according to some private business, so we'll be continuing the rest with today guests **

Then two bodyguards came and went with her to board for the plane, since our location were at the airport, I figure shes going back to US. So we're back with the show now, and the next team-

Ah- The Easy Brothers team.

**Kwang Soo & Sukjin team **

The moment the song played- I immediately knew, let alone. WHO it is.

**Push push baby! Oh push Baby! Push push baby! **

"JUST LIKE SISTAH!" we all chorushed and-

Hyorin stepped out!

But she din't look happy. We all knew she was disappointed-heh.

"Eh? I'm with Kwang Soo & Sukjin oppa?" she looked completely surprised.

"Well of course!" Kwang Soo replied cheerfully.

Silent...

**NOW GO TO YOUR SPOT SO WE CAN DO THE NEXT TEAM! **

Hyorin just glumly made her way over to the easy brothers, next team is Lizzy. She squeal and I laughed at her childishness. "Good luck!" I called out as she made her way to the center.

"Is this going to be male guests?" Jong Kook oppa asked curiously.

**Lizzy team **

The music went on, and it perks my ears.

**Cause I can't stop thinking bout's you girl **

Super Junior? Siwon!- But-wait...what am I saying?

Leeteuk oppa & Sungmin Dongsaeng went in. I was shocked more than surprise-Super Junior are here? Guest starring? ! That's what Donghae oppa always want! I felt as if I wanted Siwon to be here for a moment-but no. It wouldn't be possible.

"AH! Sungmin oppa! Leeteuk oppa!" Lizzy yelled, "I can't believe you guys are here!" She was really happy, i'm happy for her. I know she idolizes these two a lot.

"Hey Liz!" Leeteuk greeted her cheerfully.

The three went to their perspective after a huge greeting, then this is when my heart started to pound. It's my turn, and i'm nervous who i will be with!

"Hwaiting!" Lizzy told me "I bet you'll be with two male guests today!"

I heard Gary scowled "IT SHOULDN'T BE!"

"Our Ji Hyo shouldn't be without my permission first" Jong Kook said then turned to me "Am I right?"

I got angry so I yelled at him.

"HEY YOU!"

He laughed "Just kidding! You'll do fine today-geez. Your really hot blooded"

My temper died down and I just smiled sweetly at him in return. "Sure oppa-as long as I beat you"

He smirked "Bring it on then! Ace!"

**Ji Hyo team **

_This is it... _I thought, making my way over.

* * *

><p><strong>Because I naughty naughty<strong>

**Hey i'm Mr Simple!**

**Because I Naughty Naughty! **

My eyes widened and I nearly die of happiness when I saw him-the one I been dreaming of all day-

"CHOI SIWON AND CHOI MINHO!" Lizzy screamed.

I felt my heart beating so fast, I don't even know what i'm saying to them. Choi Minho is my idol and Siwon is clearly my lov-

NO! NO! NO! Crossed that out! Siwon my idol too!

"I told you i'll be here with you soon"

His voice was echoing in my mind, what he had told me from that yongdam tea discussion. I don't know what i felt about him, Donghae is clearly the one I love more but yet the way Siwon treated me, made me cried suddenly.

Lizzy frowned at me "What's wrong unnie?"

I kept on crying, by now all eyes were on me. Minho was clearly confused "Ji Hyo shii-your're okay?"

"I-I'm fine..." my voice were croaked.

Jong Kook seems to get what I meant, "It's okay guys, she was just happy to team up with Siwon and Minho."he joked.

Everybody seems to be convinced so they went on with the first mission. I saw Siwon looking at me with those eyes, he din't seems to be convinced from earlier so he shot me several 'are you okay for real' looks. I replied 'i'm fine'.

Then we continuing the show on coolly.

* * *

><p>After the episode ended, we went home. Siwon were driving me and Minho home since he's the only one who brought his car. In the end-Sulli team wins, Minho looks disappointed by that. I knew i'm the one who got us in this mistake.<p>

"i'm sorry guys" I confessed. "I could have listen to you guys"

Siwon eyes widened, "What are you talking about?. I know I ask this question out of the blue so that's why hes so surprised.

"Minho said it's the other way-but i declined it and nearly let us down."

I heard Minho scoffed "Nonsense! It's not your fault, everybody makes mistakes. Don't take all the blame-since Siwon thought it was it too."

Siwon glanced at me "He's right"

I couldn't say anything after that, we just went to Minho house to drop him off.

* * *

><p>"So what do you think about this episode?" I ask, starting a conversation.<p>

He shrugged "It was fun, except..."

I look out the car window, "Except what?"

"You seems to act differently, especially at the beginning. It bothers me, why were you crying?"

Um...

"I-I can't explain..." I finished.

He seem to get that I needed privacy, so he let me off this time.

* * *

><p>I was in the mall with Lizzy and Hye Kyo unnie, when I suddenly saw Donghae oppa with Kyuhyun dongsaeng. The two were laughing and talking to each other, I quickly pulled Lizzy and Hye Kyo over to let them sees.<p>

"Is that?-"

"Donghae shii and Kyuhyun shii?" Lizzy questioned.

I nodded in return. Hye Kyo snapped her finger "-oh I remember! I heard about Kibum departing. So I had heard about Kyuhyun shii and Donghae shii relationship gaining." she notified. "Ji Hyo, is it okay with you?"

I shrugged "If Donghae oppa is happy with Kyuhyun...then I guess I-"

My mouth gaped open in surprise, I couldn't believe it. The moment I said i'm fine without Donghae shii, pictures of Siwon oppa appeared!

"What?" she asked me. I laughed nervously, "Never mind-"

The two gave me some strange looks before they got their attention back to the guys. Whew, good thing I pulled off this time...

Lucks are really on my sides today- and Patrick Day are coming soon.


	5. Suspicious Kibum & An Ruined Plan

The emails from Kibum are making me very happy each days. And I feel great that we're still in contact with each other. But Ji Hyo, Siwon and Kyuhyun are making me crazy! Those three have been messing my life WAY too much!

Ji Hyo and I are STILL awkward.

Siwon is making me falling for him HARDER.

Kyuhyun is BOTHERING me-too much about our 'pretend relationship'.

But most of all-I FREAKING WANT KIBUM TO COME BACK HERE! WHAT TOOK HIM SO LONG TO BUY AN AIRPLANE TICKET?

Okay, I sounds like a crazy person so let's go on with the story.

* * *

><p>Kyuhyun has forces me to go shopping with him-you know. Buying gifts for him and such, so that paparazzi can see it and published it worldwide. See? Your're surprised, aren't ya? Lee Donghae is acting smart.<p>

We were outside the chocolates stores, when I suddenly received a text message- from KIBUM! YES!

I open it and read it.

**[ Fishy, let's video chat on Skype] **

I type back a reply.

**[ Kibum ah- can't right now. Probably maybe fifteen minutes later?] **

The response came back after two minutes.

**[ Sure] **

I closed my phone before Kyuhyun saw me.

"Who was that?" he questioned.

I shrugged "Kibum"

His voice faltered "Oh..."

* * *

><p>I'm finally at home, being able to chat with Kibum right now. But at the same time, Siwon is reading his bible, so he probably could hear our conversation clearly. I logged in my Skype account and immediately saw Kibum name popped up online.<p>

I sent him the video chat request, before it made some sort of music and that long time face appear on the screen, oh how I miss him dearly!

"Annyeong haseyo, Donghae hyung"

I smiled big and nearly felt to cried. "Kibum shii! WHERE YOUR PLANE TICKET!" I shouted dramatically, "Where!"

He laughed "Sorry no-i'm not Kibum, it's Kim Bum"

I smirked, "Oh well, I guess I gotta hang up and called the REAL Kibummie then-"

"OKAY! Okay! I give up-Hi Donghae!" he greeted.

I sighed happily "Ah- it's been a long time- hasn't it? So how are you in the US?". After i said that, he laughed awkwardly. I just frowned at him, "What? You seems nervous...did something happen?"

"No of course not!"

I twitched. "Then why is those beeping machines at the hospital is at your house?"

"Oh well because one of my friend is injured!-Yea she injured!"

I nodded slowly "Well is she okay?"

"Yes, she's fine. I'm suppose to take care of her now-right friend? Yeah! She says yeah."

Siwon got up from his chair and join our chat. "Hey Kibum-where are you?" he called, and I raised my brows. What the heck is going on?

"Oh hyung, i'm taking care of my friend!"

Then we heard a girl voice in the background. "HEY OPPA! I BOUGHT SOME MILK FOR YOU! THE HOSPITAL FOODS OVER HERE ARE REALLY FRESH SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT HAVING A STOMACH ACHE!"

Oppa what? Hospital?

"Kibum, I thought your at your house! Why are you at the hospital?"

Then the girl was in the camera, I could see her face fully. She looks familiar, it's like I met her before-but I don't know where-

"Oppa? Is that Donghae oppa? !" she questioned.

I heard Kibum talking quietly to her. I frowned, who is she? Is this Kibum injured friend? If she is, then why is she jumping and so active?. I was completely clueless, but Siwon looks like he knew what's going on.

"Hey Sohee, is that you?"

She look at the camera again. "Oh Siwon oppa!- I-I din't know you are here"

"You left early for Running Man episode 75- din't you?"

I could see the nervousness in hers and Kibum eyes. I was more mad than ever, what's going on? Kibum is hiding something!

"Sorry Siwon and Donghae- we have to go now, the doctor said I- I mean! Sohee prescription for medicine is here!"

Her head bobbed up and down in agreement "Nice meeting you guys!"

And then their camera turn off.

I grunt and went to call them again- but found Kibum name offline. I hit myself in the head "DANG IT!-SIWON YOU KNOW HER?"

He shrugged "She was in Running Man with me on that day-but she have to go back to the US, so I don't know what happen..."

Something is really fishy now...and I intend to find out about this.

* * *

><p>On Sunday, I went to grabbed the newspaper. Only to found the shocking news Kyuhyun has hoped for.<p>

_Donghae and Kyuhyun! The newest best Super Junior couple has been found outside the chocolates stores, they truly look like a couple while Donghae is selecting gifts for Kyuhyun-is this love? Or is it friendship? _

_Read more at kpopnews. com _

I sighed to myself, some younger brothers are just so troublesome.

I went in the kitchen to find Siwon at the table, sipping his coffee while reading the same article. I grabbed some chocopies and join him at the table, his hand was clutching the newspapers. He's angry...so does that means the jealousy works?

"Oh, Kyuhyun and I were shopping that day." I informed, "He wanted some chocolates so I bought him some."

Siwon nodded, "I see"

He put down the newspapers and look at me. I squirmed in my seat and tried not to gulp while eating the pies.

"Maybe we could do that sometimes too"

I twitched, his voice was so husky and deep, it sent chills down my spine and internal organs.

"Do that with Kyuhyun" I suggested, trying not to gaze at him.

Siwon scoffed, "I don't need to, I only like doing it with you."

Okay...so big trouble. He's not caring about Kyuhyun-he's not jealous because of Kyuhyun-the jealousy is ruined and now me and him were in a room...alone. And he's using seduction voice on me. So practically, I was the one who he was jealous with.

KILL ME NOW!


	6. Hiding From You! I Need You Here!

_I was pumped up, excited to be in the competition with the Running Man cast. Until...I received a shocking call, from the US. I frowned though, the Wonder Girls had already said that it's okay for me to go back to Seoul for the Running Man release. So why did they suddenly called?_

_I flung my phone open and my heart nearly burst. It was from Kibum..._

_I called him back, the signal went on. A few seconds later, I heard his voice, not normal like before, his voice was..._

_Croaked..._

_"Sohee-"_

_I shook my head furiously, what am I thinking? Why would I think that Kibum is in trouble? Am I really that protective?_

_"Y-Yes?" I replied._

_I heard him cough, "Are you filming now?". I sighed deeply before firmly answer "No...not yet-your're okay oppa? You sound sick..."_

_"It's nothing...i'm just in the hospital"_

_My eyes widened "YOUR WHAT?"_

* * *

><p><em>As a result, I canceled the show request and made my way back to the US. I couldn't stand being in Seoul without knowing if Kibum is okay or not, what happen to him that I did not know? Is this because he overworked himself? <em>

_I attended the flight and sighed deeply to myself. I never noticed anything strange that he did-how could I when he keeps on smiling?_

_A guy went on the plane and took a seat next to me-I seated myself closer to the window so that he could have some rooms. But he turned to look at me and smirked, I squirmed in my seat when I meet his gaze._

_"I know you-you're Sohee from Wonder Girls right?" he asked me, I nodded and he just chuckled._

_"You dance very good-"_

_I nodded again. "Thanks"_

_Then he looked at me again, and the next statement just completely stunned me._

_"You don't really talk much too"_

_I twitched and felt a lump in my throat. "I-I guess" my voice faltered by his comments..._

_He just laughed in return. "Alright i'm just playing! You really look like as if you were about to cry-"_

_I frowned "Maybe I am."_

_"Sorry" he said. "I'm Heechul by the way-" _

* * *

><p>That was my experience on the plane, currently, i'm at the signing desk and waited to go in the room. I was nervous, and wonder what was wrong with him? I waited for about 5 minutes before the lady said I can go in now.<p>

I open the door and found myself crying, he was on the hospital bed with an inhaler. And I found his arm injured too. His eyes were closed, maybe he was sleeping. "Kibum oppa?" I whispered, going to the hospital bed and sat on the stool, "You hear me?"

He opened his eyes slowly and saw me. "Sohee? Your done with the show?"

I shook my head. "No oppa- I cut early so i could see you"

He frowned "Why?"

"Because-" I said "I'm worried"

I couldn't tell if his expressions is angry or worried, but whether as that-he did not look happy as before.

* * *

><p><em>-Recap Kibum pov-<em>

_I was in my room, practicing my lines when i suddenly felt I was suffocating. The pain was mired and I felt like can't breath. I gasped, trying to grasp for air as I reach towards the shelves to pull out some pills. But my hand hit the sides of the shelves and I stumbled backward. I look at my hand to see it slices tiny drop of blood._

_I reach for my phone, dialing it with the other hand. _

_"911, what's your emergency?"_

_I took some breath and calmed myself down. "I'm at Grand Spring neighborhood"_

_"Alright we'll be there quickly"_

_They hung up and I lay there on the carpet floor. I breath in and out-my mind can't focus and for a moment. My state of mind, i'm suddenly at a room with white endless walls. Memories of my life suddenly came to view, from the moment I was born. To when I first perform on stage, my first debut, my first acting career. First time I met Donghae and the members and Sohee-_

_That's all I saw before they arrived and take me to the hospital. _

* * *

><p>I was angry, Sohee has to left behind things like that for a small tiny matters like me. I'm supposed to be the one doing that, not her. I felt weaken-i'm the one who supposed to care for the girl, not the other way around. I truly din't like what she did.<p>

No one had ever done this for me...

"K-Kibum?..."

* * *

><p><em>Sohee POV <em>

"K-Kibum?..." I stammered. Is he mad?

He hold my hand and pulled me closer towards him-I flinched slightly by his sudden outburst. His hand caressing my hairs, I gulped and tried to squirmed out. Again, I felt weaken and tried my best not to ogle.

"Next time-Don't do that again."

I blinked in confusion "H-Huh?"

"Don't just risk stuffs for me. I don't want you to do that."

I smiled sadly. "I was just worried"

He cut me off "-Still, don't do that."

The door suddenly opened, and I saw that same guy from the airport!. Kibum quickly let go of me-the guy was frowning at us, then he suddenly remembered me.

"Sohee shii! We met again!"

* * *

><p>I blinked. "Heenim?" I can't remember.<p>

"Heechul" he corrected.

I kept my head low. "Sorry" I mumbled. But the guy just laughed, Kibum nearly looked shocked though-he knew this guy or something?

"Heechul hyung-why are you here?"

Heechul shrugged. "Ah- I just have to be transported to America for the new CF. Until I met Sohee shii on the plane-you two knows each other?"

Kibum nodded. "Yeah- I din't know you met her."

I was standing there as the two exchange talks to each other. Turns out-that Heechul guy is part of Super Junior, how can I not know when Kibum in Super Junior? And it looks likes they're very close, Heechul had told me Kibum suffered concussion, asthma.

"If you ever stay home with him-tell him don't take pills. He would have trouble sleeping"

I nodded. "Got it"

Heechul turned to me. "You want to buy a few snacks?-I just saw some in the cafeteria."

"Sure" I answered.

Me and Heechul went out after Heechul told Kibum to rest, we walked around until we find the cafeteria. I sat down at one of the tables, and Heechul pulled out some moneys. Is he going to pay for two of us? I better stopped him.

"Heechul shii-let me pay"

He smirked "Just let me-my treat?"

Before I could replied, he went to buy the goods. I blushed though, I feel flatter, some guys like him would never do that for me.

* * *

><p>He return after awhile, he bought us three strawberry milks. Some sugar cookies, and Lucky Charm cereals in cups. I smiled before reaching for a sugar cookie-for someone like him. He picked some good sweets.<p>

"Thanks!" I thanked him.

He pushed the cereal cup closer, "Eat it all."

I frowned "Why did you buy it?-"

He smirked "Cause I know your going to eat it"

"Who told you I will?"

"You do"

"No i din't"

"Looking at someone like you-I know you do"

I pouted and grabbed the spoon, before eating it. "I'm letting you off this time-smart one!"

He chuckled. "Right"

* * *

><p>We return to Kibum room after eating-Heechul is a nice person though. He bought Kibum another cereals cup. And the extra strawberry milk was actually for Kibum. At least, he's not much of a jerk-except to me...he is.<p>

We saw Kibum on his laptop-maybe he's chatting with someone. I glanced at Heechul before preparing my voice. "HEY OPPA! I BOUGHT SOME MILK FOR YOU! THE HOSPITAL FOODS OVER HERE ARE REALLY FRESH SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT HAVING A STOMACH ACHE!"

He winced slightly, Heechul smirked before leaving the room.

"Kibum, I thought your at your house! Why are you at the hospital?"

I went to the camera to see two guys, one is taller than the other. But my eyes laid on the younger ones, i'm guessing HE must be Donghae.

"Oppa? Is that Donghae oppa? !"

Kibum leaned in to me and we suddenly have a silent conversation.

"Don't tell them I have asthma and concussion."

"What! Why? They're your friends!"

"I don't want them to worried about me."

"Oppa...just because your hiding doesn't means that it will never be found out."

"I know that for a fact. But they all have troubles in their life and I don't need them to worried more."

"I guess..."

He smiled sadly, "There no need for anyone to worried about me"

But...I do...

My heart just sank when I heard his words, he really cared for them. Though they were all separate from him-he still wishes them the best. For a moment, I thought...maybe it wasn't his choice the fact that he have to left. I felt like he wasn't leaving because of acting, I felt like he left because the SM Entertainment forced him to...

Someday...I wish I could be like him.

"Hey Sohee, is that you?"

The older guy said-wait a minute...HE'S SIWON!

I blinked rapidly. "Oh Siwon oppa!- I-I din't know you are here"

Kibum glanced at me suspiciously.

"You left early for Running Man episode 75- din't you?"

Oh wait he was there that time! I completely forgot!

We looked at each other frantically-they're going to figure out! Right at that moment, the doctor came in and handed Kibum prescription!

We better close this before things started to get fishy!

"Sorry Siwon and Donghae- we have to go now, the doctor said I- I mean! Sohee prescription for medicine is here!"

I nodded awkwardly "Ah-Nice meeting you guys!"

We closed up the chat immediately, I sighed. That was a close call, the doctor said they have to check-up Kibum so I have to leave the room.

"I'll be back soon oppa-"

He nodded "Don't risk yourself...again"

I smiled. "No worries, I won't"


	7. Meet Heechul,Let The Truth Burst Out!

"Action!"

Heechul positioned himself in front of the camera, and they started filming. "Wow look! This energy plus drink is amazing!". He took a sip and nearly gagged himself, but to regained back with a cheerful smiles. "Buy one today!"

"AND CUT!-"

He started choking, the crewmen surrounded him and asked the actor if he was okay. He replied back with a "Get me some water"

"How in the world do these drinks makes profits anyway?" he complained to the producer. But the older man din't answer his question, instead-told him to get ready for tomorrow CF.

"Aish-what a life for me"

* * *

><p><em>Heechul POV <em>

I went to the hospital to check up on Kibum. But these annoying nurses wouldn't let me, I couldn't even understand what English were they speaking. "Sir, we do not recommended visitors at this hours. It's more stationary for the doctors to check up on all the patients".

Kim Heechul doesn't wait. Kim Heechul doesn't care what you says. He need to visit his dongsaeng and he gets what he wants.

I scoffed. "You could have said 'it's close sir' instead of recemended or steationary-" I mocked and they quickly pulled me out of the hospital. "HOW COULD YOU PEOPLES DON'T KNOW WHO I AM!-NO WONDER WHY THEY DON'T LISTEN TO KOREAN!"

The guard haven't heard me. But they closed the door on me.

Tch. Whatever.

I turn around to walk away but to find someone familiar. I smirked as she approached closer to me, then out of nowhere...I decided to scare her so I hid around the bush and waited for the right moment-

"BOO!"

She jumped from heart attack and tried to regain herself. I burst out laughing as I rolled around on the ground, bursting with tears in my eyes. Then she hold me up and got me one of the biggest slaps I ever got from a girl, beside my mother.

"Not funny oppa! YOU gave ME a scare!"

I stopped laughing and grew solemn, "Your're here to check up on Kibum aren't you?"

She sighed, "Of course I am, I have to know what happen to him." She sat on the bench and I joined her, and we just sat there silently.

I wonder how's Kibum doing, and I wonder how he met her. They really have one of those auras whenever I saw them together-that actor/actress atmosphere, just somehow made people thinks they're dating.

_Though, they're not._ I told myself.

She jumped up suddenly when she spotted Kibum coming towards our way. I'm still blanked even if he gave me a direct glare, what?-is this-oh NOW I get it. But where did he comes from anyway?-why is he suddenly outside...

"Kibum-what happen?" She immediately got up without looking back at me, I slowly stood up to the sides as the two were in their conversation. There some sort of that nudge feeling in my stomach, telling me I should leave.

He seems to get lost-cause, I caught him staring-"Well the doctor told me I seems to be fine with my condition so he's letting me going home. But I still have to take the inhaler daily."

"Oppa-your're fine?"

I just watched as he slugged his arm over her shoulder. I felt sick, they're hugging in front of me-but why am I?-I barely even know this girl and I would never just let _anyone _in between me and Kibum relationship.

"I am-" then he turned to me "Heechul hyung-aren't you suppose to be filming your CF?".

I smirked and just shook my head at him, "No bummie, I wouldn't let any CF get in the way of our brother relationship-I wouldn't want to even if its a 1,000,000 CF in totals. Just checking you up-like a hyung."

His expression showed curiosity and eagerness, and I couldn't help but fall for those bright smiles. I been close to him, and i'm the only ones who knows about his secret feelings for Donghae-but it doesn't look like he's over Donghae yet even if Sohee is with him.

He's afraid-he's mad because he couldn't fall for a girl.

"Have you told Donghae?" I questioned, back to the topic "About your sickness?"

Right then, I saw confusion and yearning inside his eyes. He clenched his fists and look down at the ground. "I...-I din't"

"He will found out soon if you don't" I stated "He seems to be getting along well with Siwon from what I heard"

Smirking, I found him grunting. Jealous? About love or brother?.

"I don't need to hear-he deserved it anyway"

"Aren't you mad?"

No answer...

I silently retreated back, not saying another word to him.

* * *

><p>"Hyung" Kibum called me. We were strolling towards the cafe early in the morning, suggested by me. Since I want to have a few coffee before arriving for the CF, regardless, I have another thing in mind.<p>

"Yeah?" I answered casually, not really caring.

He stopped suddenly and I did too. We're staring at each other-I could tell what he's thinking, something about Sohee. Both of us knew that, though I let him go on first. He rubbed his head, still keeping his gaze on me.

"Is this about Sohee?-"

I smirked and turned to pet his head before started for the cafe. "Yea but apparently-it's not the only subject either"

I heard him scoffed "Then what else?"

"Donghae" I replied "We'll be telling the truth to Donghae"


	8. Run Run Party! 1:2

The next day were fulled with surprises as I made my way downstairs. I was still upset over what happen during the chat and I really tried to tell myself that Kibum probably would let me know soon-instead of hiding from me. But all my concerns disappear when I saw all the hyungs and Kyuhyun gathering around in the living room.

"Anyeong-why are you all here?" I asked them. We were all sitting on the floor-which was odd since we never have any band meeting.

Leeteuk laid out a card in front of me. "Guess what Hae?-We're invited to the Run-Run Party!"

I twitched "A Run-Run what?-"

"Run-Run Party" Eunhyuk replied "Which was to celebrate Running Man anniversary, I guess"

"No offence-but it kinda sounds stupid" Kyuhyun mumbled.

I caught him glaring at me, for someone young like him. He has some good evil aura, I swear-his aura could be sense from a 100 miles from here. I give him a few glances here and there-did he figure out about it?-that the plan was...ruined?

"Well we should go guys-since that way, we can made up an excuse to the SMTOWN that we're attending the party and doesn't have to film the mini drama" Kangin explained to all of us. "Unless you do want to-"

"NO WAY! I'M GOING TO THAT PARTY-I'M NOT READY TO DO THAT DANCE WITH SOLBI YET!" Kyuhyun exclaimed, running to his room. The rest of us were dumbfounded until Siwon stepped in the room.

"I just talk with Ji Hyo on the phone and she said that the party are gonna be tomorrow, so we better buy our outfits today" Siwon told us.

Leeteuk hyung grinned. "So it's settled-we're going to that party"

* * *

><p>In the afternoon, Kyuhyun pulled me to go shopping with him.<em> Maybe he haven't know yet<em> I thought, as we strolled toward the center shopping spree. When we were at the entrance-fans had greeted us and some even told us we look like a couple. Kyuhyun smirked at me after he heard it.

We went to 'Vest Suits Men' store. I started for the racks and began to look through the gray vest while Kyuhyun were finding black suit. Going shopping doesn't take me long, I usually just picked some simple stuffs yet people will compliment me.

"Did Siwon said anything about the newspaper?" he asked as the cashier scan our stuffs. I was pretty afraid if I tell him the truth, though it would be worse if I kept it from him. So I sighed deeply "No he din't get jealous".

That struck him, "Are you sure?"

"Yea"

I chose to left out the part where Siwon pinned me against the walls.

He grunt "So that means I failed"

And he just left with his bags without looking back at me. I know he's hurt, I felt sorry though I can't do anything else than this.

* * *

><p>I walked out of the store only to sees Siwon and Ji Hyo, shopping as I saw her smiles at him after he said something. All I could felt that time was hurt, and I din't know how I felt.<p>

_Should I follow them or go home? _

Eventually, after playing rock scissor paper. Any rock would pound any scissor-so this is when I got my gut on and actually spied on their possibly 'date'. I hid around the wall and eavesdrop their conversation.

"You want me to drive you to the party?"

"If you have a limo-sir"

"Then i'll be your chauffeur-madam"

"I am not your madam!"

He laughed and she giggled as they continued on their flirting. While I-trying not to care about this, just glumly gives up and got back to the main mall center.

"Hyung"

I turn and face Kyuhyun. He's still there-carrying the shopping bags in his hand while trying not to cry as I seen him with puffy eyes.

"You saw them..." my voice faltered, I couldn't speak.

He began sniffing-clutching the bags. "I did..."

We just stood there in silence as he walked over to me and as I let him cries his sadness away, all there is were his sobbing and my soothing voice. How I wish Siwon could just give me and Kyuhyun a chance...

_How am I suppose to cry on shoulder now? _I asked myself with tears.

* * *

><p>"Love is something we gained for-but sometimes lost"<p>

That was what Kibum wrote in his journal when he was still here in Seoul. When I open the journal, all I could see is those neat cursive handwriting like Ancient writer. I smile when I read it-he was about to take it with him that day. But he told me to keep it and I did, I love seeing his writing-almost like hearing his voice.

"Hey Donghae!"

I recognized that voice anywhere..."Ji Hyo shii" I greeted.

She sat across from me with a smile, "Oppa-can we talk?". I suddenly felt angry again, from yesterday and I just don't want to see her right now. "I can't-i'm busy" I replied coldly as I walked away from her.

_What-am I doing...it's not her fault that this actually happens, not like I think Siwon is gay and that he likes me or anything _I thought when I reached the parking lot from the Running Man studio.

"Leaving already?"

I nodded at Hangeng. "Yeah..."

He frowned "Well what about the party-don't you want to bake the cake?"

"You and hyungs can do it. I gotta get home now. "

"Alright"

I got in the car and drove away, nothing less than my angry expression and a confused mind.

* * *

><p>Early tomorrow, I decided not to go to the party...<p>

I don't feel like it and it's troublesome to go if your heart and mind it's in it mental problem and you probably don't want to bother with it anyway. So I lay down on my bed and stare at the wall as Leeteuk hyung and Kangin hyung were flirting with each other.

"Here eeteukie!-let handsome Kangin fix your tie for you!"

"Awwww-I am so lucky to have such strong useful dongseng like my Kangin!"

I rolled my eyes and look at them in disgust. "Get a room you two..."

Leeteuk stopped laughing immediately and turned to look at me. "And what about you?-why aren't YOU in your vest Kyuhyun had picked for you?".

I felt annoyed again "Nothing, i'm not coming"

Kangin suddenly spit out all the water he had just drink and look at me as if i'm crazy. Figures...he din't know that?

"You want to work on that stupid mini drama instead of going to a party that has a frosting lemon lime cake that are even bigger than some lame fish cakes you ate everyday?"

I gritted my teeth and glare "Hey! Don't call my creamy salmon vanilla cake stupid!-What about that useless raccoon cake that you bake-"

"OKAY! Let's stop it there-shall we?" Leeteuk joked, looking worriedly gleefully at us. "So Donghae! Are you gonna come or not?"

I shook my head firmly "No..."

"Too bad it's not going to be much fun without you" he sighed "Well we better get going-"

He and Kangin grabbed their coat before saying goodbye to me and left the house. I look out the window and watched as that gray sleek mini van drove away, seeing all of them happily laughing as if they din't realized I din't come with them.

I sighed before going back to my room and enjoyed the rest of my day.


	9. Run Run Party! 2:2

**RUN RUN PARTY PART 2 **

* * *

><p><em>Leeteuk, Kangin, Hangeng, Kyuhyun, Shindong, Ye Sung, Ryeowook, Sungmin, Eunhyuk... <em>

No Donghae...

**_That's weird _**I thought with a frown **_I thought he likes parties _**

I went to grab some wine before Eunhyuk came up from behind and pound me on my shoulders. I turn around and I saw him glaring, then I took a sip of the drink before wiping my mouth and asked "Yes?"

"Hey...why is Donghae so depressed nowadays?"

I frowned. "Maybe because Kibum left him..."

He shook his head. "No that's not the only reason..."

"Well why are you asking me?" I response, uninterested. "Unless you claim him as your boyfriend-then I understand."

His eyes bulged "No!-not that! Well yes-we are eunhae and I used to like him but I guess my fish is just good enough to remain as my brother so that's not why i'm asking you..."

I twitched "Then what?"

A sigh escape from him as I saw his eyes closed and he try to relax himself while I stood there.

"Should we tell Kibum to come back?"

* * *

><p>There were silence there as I thought of what he just told me. Telling Kibum to come back?-what does his best friend matters to him? They're friends...not some distance lovers like Eunhyuk thought they were.<p>

"And why is that?" I said "Isn't Kibum too focusing on his acting to care about this?"

His eyes glowered "Not that-"

"No we shouldn't" I reply before thinking-or else MY plan would be ruined. I saw how Kibum look at him and I know for sure that my dong seng is crushing on my hae. I'm not gonna let them realizes that they both loves each other.

Donghae is too dense so he haven't realized that Kibum love him-so I took this chance.

"Why not? Kibum is the only ones that could make him happy!" he argued, stepping closer to me. "Unlike you-who doesn't knows a thing you did to him"

I scoffed. "What did I do to him?"

"Uh? So you haven't even know that your younger brother had cried himself to sleep every night because his father had died from cancer? Or his only best friend he can rely on left him? ! Or how you flirt with that girl just to satisfied yourself and forget about him!"

"Look-your being dramatic. Kibum din't exactly left him and I din't exactly flirted." I answered.

Eunhyuk smirked "I know why you did this-your trying to act like your straight so that you could escape your feelings for him-or else you wouldn't care less if Kibum come back"

I gritted my teeth "I thought your 'vowing' for Sihae"

"Really? Well sorry but I think 'Kihae' is better now..."

* * *

><p>"THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING TONIGHT!"<p>

The audience clapped when Jaesuk appeared on the stage with Ji Hyo who's wearing a sequined top dress with gold shoes and hoops. Fans and paparazzi were flashing their cameras at the two.

I sat at the bar and Kyuhyun came over.

"Siwon-mind explaining why Donghae not here?" he said when the waitress handed us soju. I put lemon in mine and took a sip, the flavor were satisfying and sour. I sipped a a bit more and put down the glass before facing him-visions a little blurred.

"He's your boyfriend-YOU suppose to know" I slurped, reaching for the drink once again. He looks worried-I couldn't care less when I tilted his chin up, our faces were inches away from each other as I was about to whisper in his ears-hearing his whimpers.

"Yah Siwon! GET AWAY FROM HIM!"

I got annoyed by the interrupt and I saw Sungmin hyung stomping over to where we are before he held Kyuhyun hand and pulled him away from me. At the same time-Leeteuk and Kangin hyung came by.

"Yah-Siwon ah, your okay?" Leeteuk asked, patting my shoulders. "You seems wavering-why don't we get some cake?"

"No thank you" I murmured.

Kangin rolled his eyes "You haven't sing or enjoying the party-all you did is getting drunk and you hit on Kyuhyun..."

"Ji Hyo is looking for you" Leeteuk said, convincing me to get off my seat.

I shook my head. "No just let me rest right now!"

A girl came towards us-and I saw that she was disappointing when she saw me. I look up then put my head down again. Ji Hyo had her arm crossed when she saw me. I hummed and almost slept before she patted my back.

"Siwon oppa-let's eat right now, there still some purple frosting left for the cake-you want some?"

I kept my head low "I'm tired..."

She sighed "So you want to go home now?"

"Yes..."

She nodded and got up. "Well see you tomorrow"

...

* * *

><p>It was real dark when I got home and all I saw were lamps outside our condo. I reach the front door and try to look for my keys, it took a few minutes because of my blurred vision but I eventually found it.<p>

I got in the house to meet hollering and screaming from me and Donghae room's. Curious-I went up the stairs and open the door to found him sitting on his bed with a grim smiles plastered all over his face.

He noticed me when I came so he waved and I smiled back at his childish behavior. I realized I miss him throughout the party-no wonder why i'm not having fun. That kid would usually come and annoyed the heck outta me-but that's why my life was interesting...

I also sat on his bed and notice he was on his computer. I smirked "So what happen? Why do you look so excited?"

He heaves happily "Siwon?"

"Yes?"

"Kibum told me he will be back in a week!"


	10. Why Is He Back? Before The Visit P1

_I also sat on his bed and notice he was on his computer. I smirked "So what happen? Why do you look so excited?"_

_He heaves happily "Siwon?"_

_"Yes?"_

_"Kibum told me he will be back in a week!" _

* * *

><p>I can't believe what just happen...<p>

Donghae looks so happy-what exactly happen he was home alone?...why is it so fast...what's the real reason why THAT guy came back?

I says nothing as I stumbled into the bathroom, but accidentally tripped on the stool. I grunt but found myself laying there, the alcohol still haven't come off and just got me very annoyed.

"Siwon! Siwon!"

He ran into the bathroom and flipped me over on my back. I groaned and he frowns at me.

"Your drunk?"

I breath in and out slowly...

He sighed and try to carried me back to the room while I don't give in. Clearly, sadness overwhelmed me and I felt as if my heart just sting me...christian guys like me doesn't just get drunk normally like this.

But HE made me do it...

I gave up by pinning him against the wall and lend him closer in my arms. He shivers a bit and try to struggles his way out but I hold him back and put him on his bed. I pulled the blanket over him before my lips crashed against his.

He was at a loss for words...

I grimly smiled "Night" and went on my bed and falls asleep.

...

* * *

><p>...<p>

...

Only a week until that Kibum comes back. As Heechul says it, he came back to visit us-but in his tone-I could sense that there were another reason...

I notice ever since we heard the news, Donghae smiles more than usual...and he talks to me not in the same way he used to talk...his voice had now gone serious but still cheerful-though I miss how he stutters around me.

Speaking of which...I couldn't really tells what happen last night that made Donghae walk past me without any greeting, I stood there with a stunned expression-though I couldn't tell if i'm confused or not.

But I run into him again while I took out the garbage in our dorm.

It took him a few seconds to notice me before he kept his head low and walked on past by. Which felt as if millions of arrows had just shot me sent from cupids from above-well those always mess up love's!

"Yah-Lee Donghae" I called out.

He turn around-his features made my heart melt. In all of this times, he had grown...his brown hair fringe still frame his face perfectly. That's when I thought about what Eunhyuk had told me and there I felt like a jerk...I have not been known how he cry every night underneath those smiles that I grave for.

"Yeh?..."

How could he smiles brightly because of me? He never did though I wanted him to...

"What did I do last night?"

He had slightly smiles-but when I mentioned last night. His frown came back and he humped in annoyed.

"Nothing"

I gritted my teeth "Fine then..."

He nodded and walked past me. After he went by-I clench my fist and throw the garbage bag into the can before kicking it angrily to released it all out. I never felt betrayed like this before and it hurts when I thought about it! I AM STRAIGHT!

I knelt down beside its and suddenly saw photos-lying there beside the trash can. Curious-I picked some up and examine them, but it's all photos of Donghae-and...me...

I gritted my teeth in annoyance _He throws away pictures of us!_


	11. I'm Coming Too,Before The Visit P2

"Aww I love this!" I squealed "Thank you oppa!"

I was holding a teddy bear he had bought for me. It was a Patrick Day one and it looks so cute!-he chose some really cute one for me!

He smiled "Don't worry about it-you done a lot for me and I appreciate it. Thank you for being here."

I puffed my cheeks. "No problem oppa"

* * *

><p>We were at home. And the doorbell then ring, I got up to open it and only to found Kim Heechul standing there with a 'boring' expression on his face as always. I couldn't believe they were friends...<p>

"Looking for Kibum?" I questioned, of course I knew the answer.

He rubbed his head "Uh yeah...of course-well I just need to talk to him"

I motioned for him to come. "Come on in"

He shook his head in response. "Nah it's okay-I'll just need to speak with him out here".

I nodded "Kay." And went into Kibum bedroom.

"Oppa, Heechul oppa is looking for you" I called.

He nodded his head. "Yeah sure-I'll be there."

* * *

><p><em>Why are they speaking on the front door...is it a serious matter? <em>I thought. It might be private matters but I was just curious...

I sat on the couch and switched through channels in the TV. Mostly were scary movies-not my interest so I turned it off instead.

He come back after a few minutes. And his expression were hard to tell...

I suddenly remembered "Oppa-about what you told me...your going back to Seoul to visit Donghae..."

He nodded.

"And I'm just asking..."

He cut me off. "You want to come with me"

* * *

><p><em>Oh god-how did he know that? Am I too obvious?<em>

I blinked and kept my head low "How did you know I was going to say that?" I muttered.

He smirked. "Well it's too obvious you care..."

I was dumbfounded. "Care what?"

"About me"

I nodded to agreed. "Yeah because your my friend!"

"No I mean more than that..."

I crossed my arms. "Brother and sisters?"

He shook his head and sighed. "I wish you wouldn't be dense..."

I glared. "What does that suppose to mean?". He gave me his smirk and shook his head.

"Nothing-well your coming with me"

I beamed. "So it's a yes?". I really can't wait till we get to meet Donghae oppa!

* * *

><p>...<p>

...

...

We get to pack in the weekend. I wanted to come is because I miss Seoul badly and I guess this is a chance to see all my old friends. While Kibum could be with Donghae, it all works eventually!

_Let's see-toothbrush,toothpaste,shirts,pants,sandals and notepad _

I organized it into the suitcase before zipping it up and pick the handle-dragging it out at the front door next to my satchel. Few more days until we get to go...

We had been here a year and he probably miss them a lot...

* * *

><p><em>Please be my baby<em>

_Please be my baby_

_I want you to hold me tight and tell me that you love me_

_Because it's only you that matters to me! _

"JYP probably were impress with our perfomance." Sunye said, taking a sip of her water after break.

Yoobin smirked "Don't forget my rap part"

I bite my finger-until I got scolded by Sunmi. "Sohee ah-don't bite your finger! It's gonna be a habit!"

"I know unnie-but I gotta say, I can't wait till I get back to Seoul!" I babbled "I wanted to meet Kibum oppa friend-Donghae oppa and I needed to get some pat bing soo and those cookies that they bake near my house."

Sunye smiled. "Don't worry Sohee ah-time will past by very fast before you know it". I grinned before Kibum oppa came in to pick me home. I saw he was different than usual, he began to smile a lot more-and I really love looking at it.

"Let's go" he called me. I nodded and greet my members good bye before taking off with him.

* * *

><p>"Hey" I said. "Did you tell Donghae yet?"<p>

He was focusing on the road. "Tell what?"

"Your sickness..." I faltered.

He shook his head. "He doesn't need to know now. I will just spend times with him and we'll be acting like nothing happened."

I sighed. "But something is happening"

"He'll find out soon."

I guess that's the end of the conversation. I just sat quietly there.


	12. At The Airport,Finally Seeing You

"You heard the news right?-Kibum back in Seoul" Hye Kyo recalled. She set the paint down as she put the bow in the dress. "I heard he's back with a girl"

I frowned. "Who?"

She shook her head "I don't know-Heechul din't told me yet."

Wow how long has it been? One moment Donghae opppa were in the airport-hugging Kibum goodbye and the next moment-they're meeting again...

* * *

><p>"Hey Ji Hyo-you want to come with me to the airport to pick up Kibum tomorrow?" he asked.<p>

I smiled. "He's back here in Seoul tomorrow?"

He childishly grinned back "Well he's on the plane right now. But we have to be early since I don't want him to wait"

"Aww! Your such a cute hyung!" I cooed with cause him to redden. He rolled his eyes at me "You know what can happen in a gigantic airport"

I nodded. "I know and-yea i'll come, what about Siwon?"

"Looks like someone likes my brother" he joked. I blush in embarrassment "I do not-you two look more like a couple!"

He laughed sheepishly "Me? Him? No freakin way aha..." his voice trailed off and I raise my brows. Well?...

"If I asked you-who would you chose between Kibum or Siwon?" I smirked, knowing he's not going to answer anyway. His face were beet red and he looks like a sweaty kid at a spelling bee. But though I am curious of the answer-

"None" he replied. And at that moment-the earth were unbalanced of the answer. I twitched. "Wow i'm surprised..."

"If I don't get to chose both-then i'm taking none for even." he grinned.

* * *

><p>So tomorrow went by passed and before I know it-we're all at the airport on a cold night. It's near summer and yet I felt like big clumps of snows were being put on me. At the airport were me, donghae, leeteuk, eunhyuk, yesung, kyuhyun and hangeng. I was about to go get beverage when I accidentally saw Yoona from SNSD.<p>

"Ji Hyo unnie!" she waved. I dropped by to see her and found her with Sunny, Yuri and Seohyun.

I blinked. "Yoona what are you doing here?"

She laughed. "Oh I guess I din't tell you SNSD are having performance in US-what brings you here?"

"Oh-well i'm at the airport to pick someone up" I smiled.

Suddenly, they're all getting attention. "Who? Gary shii?"

I shook my head. "Aniyo-Kibum who are in US, he's coming back for Donghae which were sweet"

"Awww! It's really is" Seohyun squealed.

Sunny agreed. "Wishing Sungmin can do that..."

Yoona looked at her watch. "Unnie-I have to go now, i'll talk to you later?"

I gave her a nod. "At nine tomorrow"

She nodded. "Anyeong" they all chorused. I waved in return before they left, and I decided to buy green tea and got back and gives everyone ones.

"I din't realizes I haven't drink yet" Leeteuk said-sipping his tea "Loads of sugar here".

I turned to Donghae who were looking at the window. "Want one?"

He shook his head. "No thanks-you can drink it". He sat down on the bench, I followed him suit and just look at my full can of tea. It's been 11 and they haven't arrived yet, in this case-we might as well slept at 3 or something.

"I really can't wait till I see the big engine dropped down. " he smiled "Imagine him walking down and haven't realizes i'm over here-I would wave and we would run at each other and tackle"

"Very romantic" I mumbled.

He laughed "You just don't know yet-we haven't seen each other for 9 months and I felt like we're Romeo & Juliet."

I smiled cutely. "Who's Juliet?"

"Of course-it's Kibum"

I stuck my tongue out. "More like you"

He half-glared me before continuing to look at the stars and other planes which had been set. But the announcer suddenly told something that let mine and Donghae heart burst.

"Next flight from New York-US"

_Kibum from New York... _we both thought before running with Leeteuk out to departure place.

* * *

><p><strong>On plane with Kibum and Sohee and Heechul<strong>

_Kibum POV _

The night were dragging us for real. We have been on the plane for more than 3 hours and were stuck with airplane foods like corn and beans, Heechul were using the headphone to hear Shinee songs and such. I can hear 'Ring Ding Dong' from out here too.

As for Sohee-well she's sleeping. She was leaning against my shoulders and her eyes were shut peacefully.

_She looks cute while she sleeps _I thought, wanting to stroke her hairs but were afraid. So I just sat there and look at the stars, seeing the look on Donghae face when I get there. We'll be united...

And I would tell him my feelings-just hoping that bastard Siwon wouldn't be there.

"Hey what time is it?" Heechul asked. I got my phone out. **12:45 **it read, "We'll probably be there like around 1 or something." I told him-he nodded before getting back to his music.

A lady went by and ask us if we want anything. I asked for a coke before she went to get it. I suddenly heard humming...

"Want no one no one but you..."

I smiled to myself when I realizes it was Sohee. She hum while she sleeping huh?-well I want to know what else songs is she humming to.

"Cause you aree the one..."

The lady came back with the coke. I told her thank you and open the top part apart before sipping the drink with gas and bubbles rising. Refreshing as always, these wouldn't probably explode so i'm glad.

So for whole ride, all we hear were Heechul music and Sohee humming. At least I have companion right now.

"This is your captain speaking-right now the plane would set down in current location-Seoul at 12:50 and passengers may get their suitcases ready-thank you"

_Here it goes...Donghae-we're meeting again_

The plane has settle down and the captain told us to get our supplies. I took my bag and small suitcase plus Sohee satchel, Heechul also have his, I looked over at Sohee and still found her sleeping.

"One of us might have to carried her." I said. Heechul tapped on her shoulders and she jerks up. Her eyes were open but I was worried if she still sleepy. "Hey are you awake?" he questioned.

She nodded.

"If not i'll carried you-" I offer but she decline.

She blush. "It's okay i'm awake" and took her satchel from my grasp and began to walk with us.

* * *

><p><strong>Back to Donghae and others <strong>

_Donghae POV _

We're meeting him again-We're meeting him again-WE'RE REALLY MEETING HIM AGAIN!

The next plane has set down and now passengers were coming out. Now I just have to look for my handsome dong seng, what?-I wasn't the only one who think the same thing.

"Handsome Bummie-handsome Kibum-my dong seng" Leeteuk murmured and began to search through the crowds. Ji Hyo were rolling her eyes at us "Man you two are crazy" We might be but she probably goes the same thing if it's Siwon.

Hangeng, Yesung, and Kyuhyun were also looking. But honestly we cannot find him, I even mistaken a 15 year old guy who looks EXACTLY like Kibum-but she's a girl. Which was weird.

While looking-I saw Kyuhyun walking away from the rest of us. It increased my curiosity, but I decided to drop it and went back to the group.

* * *

><p><em>Kyuhyun POV <em>

I went around behind the plane to check. Sure enough-I saw 3 peoples walking down to where I am, I ran there fast and saw...

KIBUM!

My heart burst "YO! KIBUM!" I waved at him and he notice. There were 2 peoples with him, a guy and a girl. I ran to them, "Kibum! We been looking for you-Donghae all the way over there!"

"We been looking too" he panted. I guess he's been out of breath, I help him up cause he dropped down. Just then, I realizes it was Heechul hyung. "Hyung-I din't notice you were there" I said.

Heechul shrugged. "I din't get to tell you guys i'm coming too"

And my attention turn to the girl. She was looking at Kibum.

"Oh Kyuhyun-you haven't met Sohee yet" Kibum said.

She waved. "Hi"

I waved back before the rest of them comes.

* * *

><p><em>Donghae POV <em>

"KIBUM! !" I shouted "BUMMIE!"

Kibum turn to saw me but he din't get to do anything because I tackled him to the ground. It took awhile before Leeteuk hyung and Ji Hyo came to pull me off of him. I was in tears when I saw him, he din't get to stand either before I nearly strangled my hug to him. Everyone went aww when he slung his arms around my shoulders and we hug.

"Wow you weren't kidding when you said you would tackle him" Ji Hyo laughed. "Come on let's go back to the airport you douches"

Everyone pick their pace and we went back inside. My smile were still on my face the whole time.

* * *

><p><strong>Airport <strong>

Kyuhyun, Hangeng, Heechul, Yesung and Leeteuk hyung went to get some snacks. That left me, Kibum, Ji Hyo and his other friend I guess.

"Donghae hyung, I really missed you" my sweet Bummie said. "I wasn't gone for long"

I gave him a special smile in return. His appearance still look the same, his voice still had that deep edge and his killer smile can also never be change. "Of course Bummie-ah it's been 9 months already."

He nodded and look at his friend. "Donghae-I want you to meet Sohee-and Sohee this is Donghae"

I let my hand rest out "Hey Sohee-oh are you the girl from Kibum webcam last time?"

She nodded politely. "Yes Donghae shii" She also put her hand out and we shook hands, but she suddenly bent down on her knees-and her hands were covering her forehead and she started coughing. Kibum look at her-worried.

"Sohee your're okay?" he asked with concern and he also bent down next to her. Ji Hyo and I just followed suit.

"I'm fine oppa-my ankles kinda hurt from the shoes and it might be a bit from the air so i'm okay."

"You want me to carried you around for awhile?" he suggested. She din't answer yet-but he picked her up in his arms for a piggyback ride. He turn to me "Donghae hyung-can we talk later at home?"

In my mind, I want him to stay. But because of her injuries, I said "yea" and he went with her around the airport to look at stuffs. They disappeared from my view and I wish I could followed them-but Ji Hyo stopped me.

"Let's not bother the two" she said "We're going home soon anyway so let's wait here." We sat on the same bench from earlier, honestly I thought I would be tired right now and could fall asleep but my eyes were wide open.

_I couldn't believe Kibum come back to visit me but he brought his girlfriend with him..._ I thought sadly with an obvious hurt look.

* * *

><p><strong>With Sohee and Kibum <strong>

_Sohee POV _

I buried my face in his shirt. I feel tired and my toes were hurting like fire, plus I felt the need of throwing up while on the airplane. That airplane lady gave me some gunk cereals so no wonder why my stomach is sick.

"I should have realizes you get infected by it easily"

I turn my head the other way. "I'm okay really!-Should we get back to the others?"

"Alright fine" he sighed "If you insist." And he went back to where we were.

* * *

><p><em>Kibum POV <em>

I went back to find Donghae and Ji Hyo talking like they're the happiest on the planet. Which caused me to raise my brows and set Sohee down on the bench. Are these two dating? Last time Donghae had told me they're awkward with each other and now they're talking as if they...

_No Kibum!-Calm down! You can't be jealous and screw this up-remember why your're here! _

"Hey we should let everyone go home now it's dark" I lied. But it is dark and Sohee is injured right now. So i'm not really lying.

At that moment, all the hyungs came back and we all agreed to go. I still want to carried Sohee but Heechul said he would do it instead. So I'm stuck with walking behind Donghae and Ji Hyo who still acted like they're still dating.

I'm releasing my feelings for tomorrow for sure...


	13. Do You Love Me?

I never thought this would happen again...

I'm standing outside my room. Looking at him sleeping. On my BED.

After going home from the airport, the three were tired so we din't get to finished setting up the guest room. So I let Kibum sleep in my room, Heechul in Hangeng, and Sohee in Kyuhyun.

Me, Hangeng, Kyuhyun were all sleeping on couches in living room. We felt like rocks squished on us the moment we woke up. Not a pleasant sleep at all...

But his face were so darn cute while he slept I can't help but puffed his cheeks. He suddenly opened his eyes and got up, got annoyed by what I did.

"Good morning Bummie" I whispered sweetly.

His eyes were wide-open. "Hey what time is it?"

I shrugged. "It's noon, just go back to sleep." He got up from the bed and went to the bathroom. "Thanks to you-I can't anymore" he pouted.

I laughed. "Then join us for breakfast then" and went downstairs.

* * *

><p>A moment later, we were all at the breakfast table for reunion. Without Siwon.<p>

The older gentlemen just grabbed a piece of garlic bread and skipped ahead towards the door without glancing at any of us. Right then, I knew the prince were in a bad mood, which is very bad...

Heechul and Sohee had already went out to help Sohee finds a hotel for the time being. So that left us Suju in quality times, it feels memories again. Seeing Kibum looks as he paste butter on his bread-he really had grown since I last saw him. Better yet-we're here again.

"How was the US?" Leeteuk hyung asked. Bummie smiled in return "Great-they're all really nice"

Kangin awed. "Do they recognized you?"

Of course they do.

"Most"

Everyone went back to stuffed all the roast chicken with mashed potatoes in their stomach before I felt a hand patted my shoulders.

I looked up at Kibum. "What?"

"Hey can we talk later outside"

Talk? "Sure" I answered anyway-must be serious.

* * *

><p>"So what it is?"<p>

We were strolling around the backyard garden, the atmosphere were really nice and I love seeing the shower hose as Leeteuk hyung use it to water the plant. It was a cold day around summer, since it's almost fall and we can see orange and red leaves crunching on the ground beneath us as we walk.

"Um well, w-where is Siwon?" he stuttered. I found it weird that he's asking about him.

I sighed. "He's not really in a good mood hearing that you are back-aish, such a drama king"

We walk in a few silence after the question, I felt desperate to ask about the girl that had came with him. Who is she? How come Kibum doesn't mention about her? Are they possibly...

I shook my head madly. No he knew he's coming back for me-not to go on date with his girlfriend!. Donghae stop being so jealous! He has every rights to do it!

"So..." I started "Who is she?..."

He frowned. "Mwo?"

"Your friend at the airport"

As if he gets what I meant, he nodded. "Yeah her name is Sohee, she's in Wonder Girls"

"Oh I see-well do you like her?..."

I gulp though I knew I have to ask!. His expression seem daze, I knew he was taken back from the unusual question. I felt as if my heart stung the moment I see hinted of red on his cheeks-Kibum just answer me damn it!

"Yes hyung"

* * *

><p>I felt something hard in my throat. Why am I feeling this? Am I suppose to be happy he found somebody?. My hand felt numb and my mind spin, doesn't know how to react to this news.<p>

"Really-then why dint you tell me before?"

I turned to look at him and I saw him flinched when I realized that it came out harsher than I expected. I couldn't help it, I was feeling-

_Jealousy _

Was it?

"Donghae-don't get worked up about it". He seems to be pleading.

I shook my head. "Yah! I'm totally happy," I gritted my teeth "Very!"

I turned to leave before hearing anymore of his feelings, before a hand grabbed my wrist

"Hyung do you love me?"

* * *

><p><em>L-Love? Yah Kim Kibum! Don't play with my feelings! <em>

I don't like whats happening right now. My eyes were wide open and my wrist feel so warm as his hand hold it. I am stuck here on this glue, having to answer his stupid question as if I even knows if he love ME!

"Don't play around Kim kibum" my voice were firm "Let go of my hand"

He shook his head furiously. "Yah! I'm not before you answer my question!"

I grunted and tried my best to let go, but the hold were too firm for me to react. WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THAT DEADLY QUESTION WHEN YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO YOUR OWN? !

"Let go of him now."

Another voice appeared and I look up ahead to found myself in a deathly situation...

CHOI SIWON! WHY THE HELL YOU HAVE TO APPEAR NOW? ! ?

...


End file.
